How About an Exciting Career as a Professional Fart Smeller?

According to Chinese news sources, the hottest career in health and physical well-being right now focuses entirely on analysing the smells of others’ rectal gas.

By picking up on traces sweet, savoury, bitter and even meaty aromas, these brave anal analyzers are allegedly able to identify illnesses and pinpoint their location in the body.

According to the smellsperts, extremely stinky farts indicate bacterial infection in the patient’s bowels or intestines. A raw, fishy or meaty smell, meanwhile, could point to infection in the digestive organs or even highlight the presence of bleeding or tumours in the intestinal lining. Finally, the presence of garlic or chives in our farts is thought to be an indicator that we’re consuming too much of the foods in question, which could ultimately result in inflammation of the small or large intestines.

But it’s not just the whiff of our farts that gives telltale signs about our health. The group also claims to be able to tell a lot about a person’s physical wellbeing by measuring the amount of gas expelled with each fart, with enormous guffs suggesting that we’re consuming too much fibre and mere whispers hinting at intestinal obstruction.

http://en.rocketnews24.com/2012/12/06/%e3%80%90job-opportunity%e3%80%91-how-about-an-exciting-career-as-a-professional-fart-smeller/

by Dr. Vince

Vale remora….

It is with great sadness that we announce the death of remora.

remora was a founding member of Punjapit & a great friend to all at the shed.

With sincere sympathy,

robin

‘Nun’ caught on camera stealing beer

CCTV footage of a ‘nun’ caught on camera stealing beer from a US convenience store is going viral online.

The clip, which has notched up close to 150,000 views on YouTube, shows a woman wearing a nun’s habit opening a refrigerator full of beer.

She is seen reaching for a can of beer then having a quick look around before surreptitiously putting it inside her habit.

The ‘nun’ then walks over to another refrigerator and takes out a bottle of water, which she holds in her hand before returning to the first refrigerator for another beer.

It is not clear whether the woman is a real nun or merely a petty criminal using a costume as a diversion.

http://web.orange.co.uk/article/quirkies/Nun_caught_on_camera_stealing_beer

by The Punjapit Alliance

Closed for a End of Summer Holiday

Management has asked us to take End of Summer vacation….

So Punjapit is going to be closed & will reopen mid October.

(Arf will be guarding “the SHED”)

Japanese Adult Video Channel Seeks Male Virgins… Must Never Have Been Touched

Are you a virgin? Have you never been touched by a woman? Do you think you would not be able to “hold out” if a lady touched you?

Then you are exactly who this Japanese adult site is looking for this summer!

Japanese Adult Video maker Soft on Demand Create (‘SODC’) have been searching for lonely virgin men (called dotei in Japanese) with lots of time on their hands (and something else on their hands?) to appear in an adult video with an unannounced Japanese porn star (most probably female).

While the details are scarce, we are sure their are plenty of young Japanese male virgins rubbing their hands together at this opportunity.

However, there are a few catches.

1. You actually have to be a male virgin
2. You will be filmed and your face will appear across the web as a virgin
3. The “porn star” could be an old lady, or an old man with serious gender disorders (this is the company that brought out a video titled: “All naked nursing home for the elderly”…)

If you appear in the video you will be paid 1000 yen (about US$12). That is enough to buy a bottle of cheap vodka and get really really drunk if you did actually have to sleep with a grandma or old man.

As you can see, the benefits far outweigh the negatives!

http://en.rocketnews24.com/2012/08/15/japanese-adult-video-channel-seeks-male-virgins-must-never-have-been-touched/

by Dr. Vince

Young Japanese Women Becoming Less Interested in Sex

For the past few years, Japan has been in a fuss about soushoku danshi, literally translated as “herbivore boys.” These are young men who represent the antithesis of the rowdy, skirt-chasing, big-spending corporate man associated with the 1980s bubble economy: they’re passive, conservative with money, prefer to stay in instead of going out drinking with coworkers and are generally uninterested in sex.

Such personal lifestyle choices wouldn’t be considered problematic if Japanese society wasn’t struggling with a declining birthrate and low consumer spending. But when an ever-increasing portion of your male population is enjoying their evening with a cup of tea at the local manga cafe when you need them to be out buying cars and procreating, you’ve got a situation on your hands.

To make matters worse, a survey conducted by The Japanese Association for Sex Education (JASE) reveals that the number of young Japanese women who have had sex has decreased dramatically over the past 6 years.

Perhaps the ladies of Japan have finally given up on trying to get their male counterparts into bed and joined convent themselves.

 JASE conducts the survey once every six years to gain insight into the sexual awareness of Japan’s young generation. The latest survey was taken from October 2011 to February 2012 and polled approximately 7770 students in junior high schools, high schools and universities from across the country.

http://en.rocketnews24.com/2012/08/05/young-japanese-women-becoming-less-interested-in-sex-survey-says/

by Dr Vince

Even Non-Alcoholic Drinks Should be Limited to 20 Years Old and Up According to Survey

To all our under-age readers, I feel for you.  Understandably, alcoholic drinks are off-limits as they can be harmful to your growth at a young age.  But now, it seems the adults want to take away your non-alcoholic drinks as well according to a recent survey.

 The survey was conducted by the Daiichi Mutual Life Insurance Institute of Economic Research who gauged the public’s fears that non-alcoholic drinks encourage the consumption of real alcohol at the request of beverage makers.

In the survey 1200 people between the ages of 30 and 40 who had under-aged children were asked “What’s a good age to start drinking non-alcoholic drinks?”

http://en.rocketnews24.com/2012/08/04/even-non-alcoholic-drinks-should-be-limited-to-20-years-old-and-up-according-to-survey/

by Arthur Furrowfield

This Kitschy Sexy Lady iPhone Case Has a Hidden Surprise for Everyone to Enjoy

All you fellas out there know the best way to pick up women is by using playboy mud flaps while driving their van airbrushed with a painting of a seminude Valkyrie and wearing their “beaver inspector” T-shirt.

Well now you have another weapon in your arsenal of manliness guaranteed to score with the ladies.  This sexy bath tub lady iPhone case is certainly impressive by itself, but beneath the bath water lies secret that will tempt everyone to buy it.

The lady’s head acts as a stand for your iPhone!  Yes, the back of this woman’s head is ideal to prop up your mobile phone for web surfing or video chatting.  Is that classy or what?

http://en.rocketnews24.com/2012/07/07/this-kitschy-sexy-lady-iphone-case-has-a-hidden-surprise-for-everyone-to-enjoy/

by The Punjapit Alliance

Smokers Find New Haven in Japan, But for a Price

It’s getting tougher to be a smoker in Japan. It was once a paradise for tobacco lovers, who were free to light up in workplaces, restaurants, bars, on the street, and pretty much any darn place they pleased. Add to that the low price of cigarettes and the ever-present vending machines, and you couldn’t swing a tanuki without hitting a smoker. In recent years, though, smoking has been banned on the streets and in offices, the taxes on tobacco have gone up, and more and more public spaces are going smoke free. The government even announced recently that they are launching a 10-year plan to cut the smoking rate nearly in half.

While this trend has tobacco companies shaking in their boots, one company has turned it into a golden business opportunity. For just 50 yen, Ippuku (roughly “a cig” in Japanese) offers smokers a comfortable, indoor place to take a 15-min smoke break.

According to parent company General Holdings, Ippuku was founded on the philosophy that smokers and nonsmokers alike should be able to enjoy the neighborhoods where they live and work, and they thought that a dedicated paid smoking area might facilitate that. The company sent out a questionnaire regarding smoking habits and found that there were very few places that smokers could spend a relaxing and productive 15 minutes while they got their fix, so they set out to create some.

Starting in July, three Ippuku branches will open in Tokyo, near Ochanomizu, Jimbocho and Kanda Stations, and General Holdings plans to open a total of 36 shops covering all 23 wards of Tokyo by the end of 2015. The shops, which will be open from 6am to midnight every day, feature ventilation fans, aroma diffusers, free internet access, drink vending machines, background music, and televisions, among other features. In addition to the one-time rate of 50 yen, users will also be able to choose from day (100 yen), week (500 yen) and month (1800 yen) passes.

The company says they have tried to think of every detail to create a comfortable experience for their customers so that “even if they have to pay, people will choose Ippuku.”

http://en.rocketnews24.com/2012/06/22/smokers-find-new-haven-in-japan-but-for-a-price/

by The Punjapit Alliance

Octogenarian hopes for sex swap op

A Chinese octogenarian is hoping to become the oldest in the country – and possibly the world – to undergo transgender surgery.

Qian Jinfan, 84, a former government official, who lives in Foshan, is believed to be the country’s oldest transexual.

He said he wants to become his true female self after nearly a century feeling like he was locked in a man’s body.

Qian, originally from Jiaxing, Zhejiang Province, said he first felt that he should have been born a girl when he was just three-years-old.

“Deep down inside, I always thought it would have been great to be a girl,” said Qian.

“But only when I was completely alone would I be fully myself. Whenever other people were around, I would keep it all inside.”

Throughout their lives, Qian’s parents had no idea that their son secretly wished to become a woman.

He even got married as a man at the age of 54, and his wife too was totally unaware of his secret – as was their son.

It was not until 2008, at the grand old age of 80, that Qian finally felt the time was right to start taking female hormones, and to dress as a woman.

He is now waiting to undergo transgender surgery – but there are complications that first must be overcome because of his age.

“I have been holding out for a medical breakthrough,” he said. “I was very disappointed to recently hear that could take forever but I live in hope.”

http://web.orange.co.uk/article/quirkies/Octogenarian_hopes_for_sex_swap_op

by Dr Vince